hospital stay

Our stay at the hospital was fine. Longer than we wanted after having most the day on Friday and all day Saturday there we were ready to leave but because I had tested strep B positive they had to keep the baby there for 48 hours after he was born. We were able to have lots of visitors to keep us company. Paul's parents flew up for the weekend so we were able to see them a lot as well as Meads and McCulloughs. Hansens, Stuarts, Clay Barnes and my Grandparents also visited us. My recovery went really well and I felt good. Maverick did great too. 

 We were able to have the kids come over a few times. Even though they were sick we just couldn't bear to keep them away from meeting their brother. They were SO excited. They walked in and I was holding Maverick and we said "It's a boy! We got you a brother!" They both squealed with joy and ran over and immediately jumped on the bed and held out their hands and asked to hold him. They were absolutely obsessed from the first moment. Caitlin did say one time "but I thought I was going to have a sister" we told her she was such a good big sister to brothers so we had to get her another one. She seemed pleased and she has definitely embraced her role as the best big sister ever in every way! They are both equally as interested in the baby but Caitlin for longer amounts of time, Nolan is very aware and interested but loses interest more quickly, then comes back. They are already just the sweetest big brother and sister. In full disclosure: I really wanted a boy the whole time. I wanted for Nolan to have a little boy buddy and felt that Caitlin could hold on to her princess and second mother title and be just fine. I think because I wanted a boy I had prepared myself so much for a girl so that I would be ok with it. When I saw that he was a boy I was completely shocked and so happy. It's perfect.

We were so ready to come home on Sunday. My mom had spent the night with me Saturday night because the kids needed daddy at home. The mixture of being sick and having their parents away was a lot for them (and us) to handle. We were excited to get home and get things back to normal... Or establish our "new normal" as a family of five!

Maverick's birth: in pictures

My sweet younger sister Cassie braved her first birthing experience to take pictures for me and I'm so grateful she did! The first reactions and special moments she captured are so priceless for me.

Maverick's birth: in words

Introducing:

Maverick Liam Dickson

Born September 5th at 12:10 PM

8.0 lbs 19.5 inches

We are so delighted to have another little boy join our family! Maverick's birthday was definitely exciting in a number of ways! Here's the full birth story:

-Of course I couldn't sleep the night before... Woke up multiple times and was counting down the hours until my alarm would go off at 6 AM. Until I woke up to Paul's alarm... At 6:30! I had accidentally set my alarm for PM! So we started rushing to get ready and get the last of our things packed up. Amidst the rush we heard a loud wheezing at our bedroom door and found Nolan standing there. A few minutes later Caitlin came down crying and coughing. Both kids were sick with fevers, sore throats and not happy. I was so glad my mom was here to take the reigns and start loading them up with Tylenol but definitely wasn't the morning I had anticipated!

We joked on the way to the hospital that hopefully we had already gotten out the wiggles and the rest of the day would go more smoothly. It definitely went well although it maintained the unexpected pace!

-Around 7:15 We got to the hospital and got settled into our room. Paul made fun of me for touch-up curling my hair, but hey! My alarm didn't go off and if I'm going to be induced and know when I'm having my baby I might as well be picture-ready. Our delivery room also had a perfect view of the Mt. Timpanogos temple which I loved! 

-By 8:30 I had my antibiotic (I tested strep B positive) and my pitocin going. Also the doctor had come in and broke my water... Things were rollin'! When I started I was dilated to between 3.5-4 cm

-At 10:15 I ordered my epidural. I had wanted to feel some good contractions and they came on with a bang. I started having them every 1-2 minutes and they were hard and also there was a lot of back labor. My back was killing and they were coming at such a clipping pace I was glad to get the epidural. After I got it they checked me again (around 10:45) and I was only at a 4! I was shocked after all those contractions! We thought based on that we still had a few hours to work through the rest.

-Between getting the epidural and about 11:15 I was still feeling contractions and also started feeling a lot of pressure. The contractions had let up but I could still feel when they were coming and started feeling a lot of pressure and discomfort. I was afraid maybe the epidural hadn't taken properly because I was feeling more discomfort than I had anticipated or remembered from my past ones. I wasn't in a ton of pain but definitely wasn't the chill epidural feeling I had experienced before. I pushed the button to up the dose at 11 but contractions were still coming fast and strong-- and the pressure!

-At 11:15 I told the nurse I was still feeling discomfort and pressure so she checked me and I was at a 7.5 cm, completely effaced! Wow! Basically I had gone from a 4-7.5 in about 30 minutes. When she checked me at 7.5 she said "There's not much hair there." Paul said "If that's the case I hope it's a boy!" and Christine and I both thought "Maybe it's my little blond boy" (I'd been admiring all these cute little toe-head boys during the summer wondering if I could ever get a blond baby with our genes) The nurse said "K here's your buffer, get whatever family you need to here and then we will check you for a last time" Lorraine and Christine were already there and we called my Mom and Cassie to hurry over. Rebekah went to our house to switch watching our kids and my mom got there soon and Cassie came from Provo. Everything was in place by 11:45 and I was fully dilated as well... Baby time!

-Our doctor came in and other nurses and my legs were up in stirrups before I even knew it. A contraction came and I pushed twice. We waited and another came and I pushed about 2 and a half more times. The head came out and we were all dieing to see the rest of the body!! I felt like it was slow motion but then the doctor held up his bum for Paul to make the gender announcement.

-Paul and I both searched for a few moments to be sure and then both realized "It's a boy!" I started laughing and crying as Paul cut the umbilical chord and they placed our baby boy on my stomach. I was completely shocked!! And so excited. We were elated. Everyone was asking his name. Paul announced "Maverick Liam" and he was loud too! He was yelling, really LOUDLY as they wiped him off then took him to be measured and tested: Apgar 8 and 9, weighed 8.0 pounds even (the night before I had told Paul "I think our baby will be right around 8 pounds") and 19.5 inches long. He yelled the entire time and all the nurses were saying "He's a feisty one!" They brought him back to me and as soon as I started snuggling him he called down and stopped crying... I was in mommy heaven. We spent the next hour plus admiring our new little human. My head was spinning with all these thoughts and plans now that I knew it was a boy it opened the floodgates of what life with another boy would be like and what lies ahead! He definitely has a look all his own.. And he is a blondie! Such a surprising little package! He was very alert and calm for a long time and he has long hands and feet and he kept moving his little hands all over and exploring. I loved just looking at him and starting to get to know him for so long.

-Eventually they moved me down to our recovery mother/baby room and that was that, my quickest delivery yet and definitely most surprising! The 15 seconds of finding out the gender and emotions involved were totally worth the wait (still don't know if I would do it again though!) but there was so much adrenaline. Without a doubt the best part though was meeting this little guy and having him snuggle into me and know that he was safe and loved. Can't wait to start our life together!!

here comes Baby D #3

Tomorrow I'll be checking into American Fork Hospital at 7 AM and for our a third time our lives will be changed forever. And I cannot wait.

I would say this pregnancy was my hardest yet, just because I felt the most sick at the beginning and then compounded by having two busy little ones. So it's probably a good thing it's gone by so fast! I am so incredibly excited to add another person to our family and to finally see this mystery baby. I can't wait to meet him or her, I can't wait for the baby snuggles and the cutest little tiny outfits and baby feet and seeing what color of hair and eyes they have!! I pray that my delivery goes well and that we have a completely healthy baby. I pray that our baby is a good sleeper and isn't fussy! Most of all I pray that our baby is as excited to come down to earth as we are to receive him or her... I don't think one can ever be entirely ready for the changes a baby brings, but I feel ready enough. And I know that no matter what this baby will be completely LOVED and adored.

The kids just could not be more excited. They have been so cute and sweet throughout this pregnancy and both seem so aware of what is going to happen and they are both so open to it and ready. I'm so excited for them to meet their new brother or sister.

Tomorrow we become a family of 5!!

(pics taken 8.17)

Cortney: 40 weeks

Today is my due date. Honestly it's been a little surreal. It's been funny to have people ask when I'm due and have it be "today" or "tomorrow"It's probably only funny too because I know I'm getting induced and this is as far as I have to go! We went to the kid's museum today and had fun there. I climbed the rope bridges and have been walking, eating pineapple, doing different things and having some little contractions but nothing promising. I've given my stubborn body the due time to have this baby! I'm glad I've waited this long but SO ready to be done being pregnant and mostly to meet this baby!!

The last month of pregnancy is always the longest month of my life. Even if you are busy, and especially when you are and anxious and excited. One last pregnancy update:

Symptoms: Still no sleep for the weary. I toss and turn all night, and when I saw turn it means very slowly but often because I have that terrible groin pain that makes me cringe and my pelvic bones are cracking as I am switching sides. I've actually been like that for months now. And it takes me a few minutes to even get out of bed, stand up and prepare to walk before I feel aligned enough to do so. I CANT WAIT to sleep on my stomach again!
This baby is still incredibly heavy and over the past few weeks I can definitely tell I have dropped and baby is head down, which only increases the IMMENSE pressure!

Cravings: I've been trying to eat more healthy in hopes that I can ward off some extra weight and get in good habits for afterward. But I still can't really resist my watermelon sour patch kids and a good "Dirty Dr. Pepper" I also still eat my Life Cereal every morning.

Fitness: I've still been going to my gym once or twice a week and every single time I go it gets harder, but My satisfaction and pride level increases exponentially. Hope to see the hard work pay off afterward and it really does feel good afterward. My final weight gain has been:

News: Paul got me some beautiful flowers to celebrate only having a month left of being pregnant. I joked that my goal was to go into labor before the flowers died.
during 37 weeks: feeling a TON of pressure as baby is getting head down and ready. Have had some mild contractions of lots of varieties: high up in my stomach, lower down, cramping with a shooting pain down my inner thigh, and one night I had about 4-5 over about 40 minute span of a SUPER tight lower contraction with a shooting pain in my right side. I haven't felt them that strong since I was in labor last time. Moments like that make me so torn between thinking "this might be it" and also trying not to get my hopes up (obviously that wasn't it... no contractions after that) Also started having acid reflux at night and started taking tylenol before bed to ease the pain of rolling over and cramping up at night.
during 38 weeks: I was dilated to a 2.5 at my doctor's appointment. I was really hoping for a 3 after all the contractions I had been having. Oh well. the doctor was trying to be optimistic and tell me I may not make it my last two weeks but I'm still pretty sure I will. Contractions on and off. Although only having two weeks left is sounding really good!
during 39 weeks: I've been having acid reflux at night which has made for some pretty horrible sleep. Not a ton of contractions this week but I was at a 3 at the doctor so I am still progressing! Doctor said the head is way down but cervix still needs work. Doctor also estimated the baby to be almost 8 pounds now! He didn't think it would get as big as Nolan did though (8.10 lbs) Also entered intense charlie horse cramps in my calves this week! I was able to get another prenatal massage which was amazing. My main complaint (really for the last few months) has been the intense groin pain. Everyone lately that has asked when I'm due has said that I am really small. At my appointment I measured 38.5 weeks, so only a tiny bit small. I feel big but not huge. I also haven't gotten as swollen which has been really nice.

Inklings: My final prediction is that it's a girl. I'll go down on the record with that. I just have felt the most inklings towards it being a girl over time. Paul will go down on record saying its a boy. Really I am just so excited to finally know! I can't believe the day has finally come. I cannot wait for that moment and I know whatever it is it will be perfect!

I basically have the greatest friends ever and I was blessed two have two celebrations for the baby!

On the 28th I had a "sprinkle" with some ward friends and neighbors at Heidi Lewis' house. I was obsessed with her little invitations she made using cute cupcake sprinkles. We did a lunch time thing and it was so fun to be able to mingle an sit and chat with so many ladies who came. I'm so blessed to be surrounded by such a great group of people, I just love where we live and how excited they all are for our family. the party was darling and the company was even better. So many well wishes and love felt.

On the 29th I had a girl's night with close friends at La Jolla Groves, put together by Christine. We had a fun night talking, eating and enjoying each other's company. We swapped childbirth stories and talked kids and made wagers about this baby. These girls are my support system and examples in mommyhood and I'm so thankful for them and their love for me and my kiddos.

Despite the last month seeming so long, this pregnancy has actually flown by. It seems even a little silly doing a final update because I know as soon as I have the baby my pregnancy will seem like a blink in the past and all I will care about is that my baby is here now... It's amazing how quickly we forget all the bad and just concentrate on the mazing new goodness in front of us.

Caitlin: first day of preschool

September 3rd has been a day long awaited in our home, almost as much as the 4th in some ways. Caitlin's first day of school (and my mom's arrival right afterward) were our last things to check off the list  before the baby got here. Our last things to hold out for.

Caitlin has been SO ready for school and so excited. I really think she would have been fine starting last year when she had just turned 3 but at that point I just wasn't ready to send her! I wanted to keep my little buddy home for another year and enjoy her and I really have enjoyed being with her all the time over the last year, it's been priceless. Sending a child to school is such a weird feeling... you are fully giving up a few hours a day to someone and somewhere else where they will learn and be molded and changed and pick things up and be around new people and ways of thinking. Knowing that she has been completely under my influence and control and teaching (other than the occasional friend's house and babysitting) thinking about turning her over makes me feel so weird! And to think this is just the beginning! But I recognize how important and good it is and I know that she will absolutely love school and her experiences. And she is so smart and ready to learn more.

She will be attending pre-school at Mrs. Maureen's in Pleasant Grove about 5 minutes from our house. She has two other little friends from the neighborhood in her class of 9 kids. She goes Monday, Wednesday, Friday from 9:30-11:45. Her teacher is very experienced and sweet and patient and the carpool situation is a plus too!

On the big day we got up and had a big breakfast then got ready. She asked me to curl her hair special for the first day. She had her new polka dot backpack filled with her special birthday treat to bring to her class (got to celebrate her bday on the first day of school!) She was excited and never seemed really nervous. We tried to get her excited but not talk it up so much so that she got nervous, it's a tender balance with her. I drove her there and outside the house Nolan started getting sad that she was leaving. He didn't want her to go and wanted to go to school with her. She so gave him a kiss and hug and sweetly said "It's ok Nolan, I'm going to school, I'l be back and see you in just a little bit! Don't be sad!" Typical Caitlin... so sweet and motherly and concerned. I walked her into her class and we found her little picture and name at the table and hung up her backpack. We said hi to her teacher she was very quiet, but not necessarily shy or nervous, just not super bubbly. Her little friends (Dax Black and Max Nord) were already there and came over to see is she wanted to go play so I told her, "ok I'm gonna go..." thinking she may resist a little but she said "ok mom, I'll see you later, because we are going to talk about the weather and the months of the year and stuff!" (pointing to all the different posters on the wall). She gave me a kiss goodbye and that was that! I went back out to the car and Nolan said "Caitlin go to school?" I said "yup, Caitlin went to school".... and immediately started bawling. I wasn't crying because I was sad, I was crying because I was so proud of her for being so great and excited and truly ready to take this next step. I really didn't think I was going to get emotional because we had been waiting and preparing so much. But I did.

During school I came back to the house and Nolan and I played the whole time. This was his ONLY day with Caitlin at school that he will ever have me to himself! We did trains, cars, blocks, whatever he wanted and we had a lot of fun. As we were playing blocks (aka be making a stack as tall and fast as I could so he could know it down) I started humming and he very sternly said "no mommy. no songs. we doing blocks." haha! I laughed out loud at how different it was to play with a little boy.  

After school we picked up a very happy and excited little girl. She had a great first day sharing her treats and playing outside and doing all sorts of things. We went and got donuts to celebrate and took them to the park and played. When we got home she had pictures and treasures to show us from her backpack and even told us the story of the "gingerman" that they had read. She said "I just love school mom! I just love it!" And I just love her.

home tour: baby's room

The baby's room... I love it. It's definitely the most simple room I've done but it feels so fresh and clean. Being gender neutral has been a little hard, some things were definitely picked out with one gender in mind more than the other. But I feel like there is a good balance. Paul has been a lot more vocal about what he likes and doesn't like and has even said a few things must go if it's one or the other (or, just that the metallic pouf has to go if its a boy). Anyways I love the subtle moon and stars theme... I love the geometrical look of the stars and my "moon stone" book ends and even that big "full moon" pouf! I also love the mobile that I made from a branch we found up the canyon.
After the baby is born: I'll add the letter of their name above the crib and some big canvas newborn pictures on the wall across from that above the dresser.

Otherwise here it sits awaiting its tiny new occupant:

details: crib bedding = pottery barn kids, metallic pouf = Joss & Main, rug = Urban Outfitters, moon poster = etsy, wood star = antique shop, metallic star = down east home, dream print = made by me, everything else is re-used or made.

joys of motherhood: august

Crazy that this was my last month with only two kids. And crazy that I'm saying ONLY two when a while ago that felt like a whole lot!

-On August 4th I got asked if my kids were twins. I am shocked that I am STILL getting asked this question, and on a somewhat regular basis.
-Nolan calls eskimos kisses "nee nees" and it's the cutest thing. Also if he kisses one cheek he insists on the "udder one!"

-Nolan has started speaking in full sentences and asking lots of questions. He is really good at talking and sometimes it totally takes me off guard when he says things so well and properly. I can't always understand him but (like Caitlin) he will keep repeating something until he is sure that he has been understood and I repeat back and acknowledge what he's saying. There is no glossing over things. Luckily he is usually pretty clear. One of my favorite things he says though is "keebuz" = because.
-I'm sure little kids always struggle with the question of "where does daddy go all day while he's at work?" I visit Paul a lot for lunch and stuff so my kids definitely know his building when they see it but the question of what actually goes on there still seems to be a mystery to them. Caitlin asked why Paul always has to go to work and we told her to he could make moneys to do fun things and go to dance class and stuff. The other day she found a quarter on the ground and she said "Look! I found a moneys! Dad, did you make this one at work for me?" I started laughing at the mental picture of Paul over a desk with a little chisel plinking away to make a coin. She apparently took us very literally. Nolan on the other hand gets "work outs" and "work" mixed up. And to make it more confusing, Paul often works out before he goes to work so he is leaving the house in work out clothes. So Nolan thinks that Paul goes and works out all day at work.
-I've probably mentioned this before but Nolan LOVES his blankie. It's Paul's old blanket from when he was a baby and it is very tattered and has been well loved over the years but Nolan can't go to sleep without it and always keep tabs on it during the day. It's his ultimate comfort. Whenever I put him in time i out i always go back in to find him with his blanket. Or whenever he watches shows and sits on the couch he wants it with him. Along with plenty of other times too.
-Caitlin will absolutely "mother" anything she can. She loves finding little "pets" and taking care of them, like roly polys and flies and whatever she can find and she loves pretending to be a mommy and talking like a mommy to anything that will let her, or even not let her. I have to tell her "they have a mommy that can tell them" all the time.
-Whenever someone sneezes or coughs Nolan is quick to say "bless you" to them. And whenever HE sneezes or coughs he expects the same courtesy right away. Even if I'm in another room if he sneezes he will call out to me, "Say Bless you Mommy!"
-If you can get Nolan to hold still for long enough, he's getting real good at cheesin' it for the camera.

-I had to look through a bunch of quotes for something and a few stuck out to me that I really like right now:
"I know it's hard for you young mothers to believe that almost before you can turn around the children will be gone and you will be alone with your husband. You had better be sure you are developing the kind of love and friendship that will be delightful and enduring. Let the children learn from your attitude that he is important. Encourage him. Be Kind. Its a rough world, and he, like everyone else, is fighting to survive. be cheerful. don't be a whiner." -Marjorie Pay Hinckley

"Remember that children, marriages and flower gardens reflect the kind of care they get." H. Jackson Brown

"That which we persist in doing becomes easier to us to do; not that the nature of the thing has changed,  but that our power to do is increased." -Heber J Grant

"What you do everyday matters more than what you do every once in awhile"